It's a sad fact of life that sooner or later we will all lose someone we love. Nothing we can do can prepare us for that time and grief is a natural response to this loss. There are occasions, however, when grief overtakes us and we just don't seem able to get over it. We can feel bereft to the center of our souls and believe life will never be the same again.
At some stage in our lives, all of us will be affected by grief of some kind. This may arise from the bereavement of a loved one but may also be triggered by a variety of other circumstances — a loss of a job, a divorce, a miscarriage, or even a break-up with a close friend or a situation like infertility, where we mourn for what may never be.
When we feel grief it's usual to go through certain stages of mourning, often referred to as denial, bargaining, anger, depression and finally acceptance. We are all unique, however, and grieving cannot really follow a specific pattern or formula. Problems undoubtedly arise when we suffer from prolonged grief where we just can't find any relief.
Transform Loss and Grief with Hypnosis
Hypnotherapy can be very supportive as we try to piece our lives back together, because although we may have thought we were mentally prepared for the loss, emotionally it can still devastate us.
When we immerse ourselves in being busy, it's often the case that we just bury our feelings of sadness even deeper. This can be particularly so for men as many have learned that it's a weakness to cry and show emotion. Hypnosis can gently allow for deeper feelings to be processed so that restorative feelings of calm and peace can start to be accessed.
If we harbor feelings that we are not "grieving properly" this, too, can make us feel guilty or ashamed. Perhaps we feel we should be crying more or feel more sadness than we do. Hypnosis is a way to talk through some of these types of thinking patterns so that we have the chance to reconcile our hidden feelings and remove barriers that are preventing us from connecting to our emotions.
Resolving Unfinished Business
Rarely are our relationships with the people we care about perfect. If we have not had the opportunity to talk things through with our loved ones before they passed away we may harbor feelings of guilt or anger. Through hypnotherapy, such feelings can be dispersed. Sometimes this is done by means of regression, where we can go back to past events and resolve conflicts in a way that makes us feel better.
If a death has been particularly traumatic or unexpected it may be that we never got the chance to say goodbye. This alone can feel heart-breaking. We can experience a cathartic release through hypnosis by accessing the subconscious mind and creating a scene whereby we can complete any unfinished business with the deceased within the safety of our own minds. This imagined dialogue can be deeply healing as it discharges a great deal of emotional pain from the deeper parts of our consciousness. During the process, the client may feel as if they have actually been communicating with their loved one in a very spiritual and connected way.
Sleep, Self-Destructive Patterns and Moving Forward
The duration and intensity of our grief can be overwhelming, creating problems not only during the day but also by interfering with our sleeping patterns and causing nightmares. We may lie awake at night and relive memories that are difficult to deal with. Hypnosis can help us to relax physically, and we can be taught useful self-hypnosis techniques to use during particularly difficult times so that we can help ourselves even when away from the therapy room.
Some people try to block out their heartache by drinking or eating too much. These self-destructive behaviors only create more problems in the long-term even though at the time they may give us some form of comfort or escape. When we allow hypnotherapy to guide us gently from pain into acceptance we can develop more control in our lives.
Acceptance is the ultimate goal we are looking for. We know we can't change the situations that we find ourselves in, but we can change the way we feel about them. Positive suggestions given to the subconscious mind can help to build a strong, supportive network in the brain so that we can get in touch with our own deeper resources and strengths. We can learn how to remember our loved ones in a way that is free from hurt and pain. Our memories may still be nostalgic and sometimes poignant, but that sharp edge of grief can be greatly diminished.
When the grief relates to a different type of loss, hypnosis is a way to come to terms with past events, strengthening our self-esteem and sense of worth. We can process how we have been feeling at a deep subconscious level through the hypnotic trance state, enabling us to look forward to a more rewarding future with greater resilience and inner strength.